Over the past month or so I’ve been lamenting the lack of variety, invention and substance in the current music ‘scene’ (spit) to anyone that will listen (which is admittedly not very many – must stop trying to engage random strangers at bus stops in musical debate, for some reason they don’t seem to share my enthusiasm for it); so what I really needed was a shot in the arm.  Something fresh, new and bubbling over with ideas, something completely out of synch with the zombie hordes of backward gazing synth pop, echoey vocalled lazy indie rock and ‘jaunty’ folk pop that clutters my inbox every morning.

For weeks and weeks I waited, clicking onto each carefully manicured Myspace page with ever subsiding enthusiasm, when finally I was jolted

out of my slumber by not one, nor even two, but three little gems of quirk pop brilliance, each taking a markedly different form, but each possessing something special, something unique, and for that they have my eternal gratitude.

First to plop onto the Joyzine HQ doormat, was ‘Retina (or More Fun Than a Vat of Love)’ by orchestral Scottish oddballs How to Swim.  It’s an album of off the wall stories, featuring a cast of sword swallowers, polydrogenous plastic surgery enthusiasts and 30 year old high school students, with music that’s just as brilliantly barking provided by HtS’s nine-piece pop orchestra.

And if you think all that sounds just a little pretentious, well, it probably should be, but How to Swim’s music possesses such a playful spirit and deftness of touch that their peculiar subject matter (much of which comes from real life news stories) seems perfectly natural.

It’s a bewitching listen throughout, but the absolute stand-out track is ‘Genesis P and Me’, an ode to Throbbing Gristle’s Genesis P.Orridge and Lady Jaye Breyer’s pandrogyny experiment, in which they used plastic surgery in order to make themselves look identical.  Aside from the irresistible story behind it, the song itself contains more unexpected twists and turns than most bands manage in an entire album, I almost wish that I could hear it again for the first time, such was the sense of wonder it created.

It’s not going to be to everyone’s taste (the best music rarely is), but if you’re willing to let it, this album will take you on a magical journey to a world quite unlike the one you know.

www.myspace.com/howtoswim

Album Reviews

How to Swim - Retina Or More Fun Than a Vat of Love
Brontosaurus Chorus - Owls
French for Cartridge - Liquorice

Also rocking the more members than you can conceivably fit on a stage vibe are Joyzine Advent Calendar heroes Brontosaurus Chorus, whose concept album about owls who watch the lives and deaths of those around them from the branches of an old, dead tree is both eerie and beautiful.

Starting with hushed spoken word intro ‘Prelude (Owls)’ this is an intricate album full of subtle shifts in mood and tempo that manages the rare feat of combining a compelling narrative with music that not only complements the storytelling, but adds to the mood and the meaning.  Violins screech and soar like the titular fowl, while horns and woodwind linger menacingly in the growl and rumble over ominous drums, all the while

sweetened by the fragile vocal of Jodie Lowther.  That’s not to say that it’s all downbeat morbid misery, ‘Ghosting’ (available to download on the Joyzine Advent Calendar) provides a necessary lift with its cheerful guitar jangle and ‘Louisiana’s last post style lament soon brightens up with chirpy strings and a springy bassline.

Brontosaurus Chorus have been doing the rounds for a few years now, having formed in 2006, but ‘Owls’ is their first full length release.  It’s been well worth the wait.

www.myspace.com/brontosauruschorus

London based duo French for Cartridge took an entirely different route to squirm into my heart with their album ‘Liquorice’.  Angular, jarring and prone to veering off on expected musical tangents, it’s a hit and miss affair, but when they get it right, as on album opener ‘Oooh!’, it’s like watching a fireworks display run by a particularly impatient 9 year old; breathtaking, unpredictable and full of swirling primary colours and big bangs.

Drawing on a hugely diverse range of musical styles, from polka to experimental rock and many more besides, French for Cartridge clearly have a low boredom threshold, which combined with their love of making strange noises and the breathy vocal of Catherine Kontz makes for some

electrifying moments.

www.myspace.com/frenchforcartridge

Faith in music restored at last then.  Who’s next?

Review by Paul Maps